Pretty Brown Girl

Research has shown that Asian men and African women are the least socially desirable when it comes to dating. 

From Grown-ish to magazine Marie Claire have discussed the truths behind dating for black women.

Right now, we are in an era where people like facets of black culture but not black people. When it comes to dating it is no exception. While broad hips and wide lips are not unique to black women, they are central features to them. What is alarming is that these features are often coveted on white women but met with disgust on black women. Additionally, there is the issue with fetishism. Black women are desirable enough to make disparaging sexual remarks towards, even for non-committal sexual relations but aren't seen as viable conquests for long term relationships.

While being black has never stopped me from putting myself out there, it is truly depressing when you think about what we have to overcome.

The poem below captures my thoughts on the subject matter.

Pretty Brown Girl 

I am the pretty brown girl that all the boys know 

Good enough to flirt with but not enough to know 

I am the pretty brown girl that they will never take home 

The pretty brown girl that forever will be alone 

The pretty brown girl you find easily to practice on 

But she will never be the one. 

  

The pretty brown girl you choose when you are done with her friends 

The one you only come after in the end 

The pretty brown girl you don't look at because she isn't fair 

Or dark, just in between so no one really cares 

Just the pretty brown girl you send your naked pictures to 

But never the one in the end you will choose. 

  

The pretty brown girl you find sexy and of course pretty 

The one you will eventually of course leave 

The pretty brown girl you don't want to spend your life with 

But throw all the kind words at, hoping she will commit 

The pretty little brown girl you assume no one will want 

Will rise out from the ashes with dignity and grace she will flaunt. 

  
Don't cry for her because inside of many of us lies a pretty brown girl 

Sometimes used and abused but never given the world 

But you can choose to cry about it and keep yourself down 

Or be the Queen that you are and wear your crown 

Let them live their lives the way they desire 

You go achieve all the things you want to aspire. 

Sources 

  

https://www.npr.org/2018/01/09/575352051/least-desirable-how-racial-discrimination-plays-out-in-online-dating 

  

https://thegrapevine.theroot.com/grown-ish-dating-as-a-black-woman-1823602249